Monday, November 29, 2010

Love is a Drug

So Sunday I said that I went to the movies by myself but I held back the title.  When I was writing the blog yesterday I felt that the movie would make an interesting entry on its own so here goes.
I saw the movie Love and Other Drugs and besides being a great opportunity to stare at Jake Gyllenhaal for two hours (so hot!); it was a pretty good movie.  I wouldn’t say great (it was a little slow at points) but the overall story definitely made the movie worth seeing.  Now I will try to keep many of the major details out of this post but if you want to see the movie, I would totally understand if you stopped reading here.
First off, the gist of this film is a romance between a girl and guy both with their own individual issues who don’t really think they are worthy of certain things.  For her, she doesn’t think she deserves love because of a medical issue she has and he doesn’t believe he can truly be successful because all he sees in himself is a subpar existence.  In typical romantic comedy fashion, the two find each other and in turn see that what they truly need in life are the things they’ve always thought were out of the realm of possibility.
Jake Gyllenhaal plays Jamie Randall, a smart screw up who has never really been able to live up to his full potential until he stumbles upon a job as a drug rep for a major pharmaceutical company during the late 90’s.  Romantically, he uses his charm to get ahead while never really committing to any one girl.  Anne Hathaway plays Maggie Murdock, a young girl suffering from a degenerative disorder which causes her to keep her distance from relationships.  She refuses to rely on people because she doesn’t think that with her disease she is worthy of being loved.  She is afraid that she will need someone more then they will need her. 
So in order to not give away the whole movie, I want to shift gears and apply it to life.  Romantic love is a really funny thing.  Some of us are lucky enough to be in it, some of us are unfortunate and have lost it, but overall at one point or another all of us are looking for it.  Love is the ultimate drug. 
There have been a very few times that I’ve felt like I was in love and in hindsight, even fewer times that I feel it was actually real.  When it comes to my love life, I’ve felt a lot like Maggie over the past few years.  Of course I don’t have a life altering disease but I have a past that has truly crippled my ability to let myself fall for someone.  I have made some mistakes and bad decisions which cause me to believe that I am not worthy of having someone want me back.  I’ve chalked it up to bad karma and other people just say I’m too picky but whatever the reason my love life has not panned out exactly how I thought it would. 
I love the show One Tree Hill and I think Brooke Davis said it best when she said, “Here’s my philosophy on dating.  It’s important to have somebody that can make you laugh, somebody you can trust, somebody that you know, turns you on… And it’s really important that these three people don’t know each other.”  That theory is for people who have been hurt when it comes to matters of the heart.  She goes on to say that all a girl really wants is someone to want them back.
I think that’s all anyone ever really wants.  Someone they want to want them back.  I know that’s all I really want.  I’ve had so many guys gamble me over the years and none fight for me.  I want someone who is going to fight for me.  In the romantic movies, the guy always chases the girl because he believes that if he has nothing else in life, he will at least have her.  Now while I am firmly grounded in reality and know life is not a movie, it’s still a nice thought. 
In this particular movie, there were obstacles preventing Jamie and Maggie from being together.  The truth is we all face obstacles every day in life.  Whether it’s regarding love or friends or work, we are constantly tested with obstacles.  It’s how we deal with the things that stand in our way that truly define us and our relationships.  What’s important to us may not always be clear but there will be that moment when it all makes sense. 
Like I said, romantic love is a funny thing.  Maybe I’m unlucky in love or maybe I’m just still looking for someone who fits me but either way I like the drug.  I’m trying hard not be closed off to the possibility of love like Maggie was in the movie, which is a difficult thing to do when romantically you just keep going down the wrong roads.   But regardless, I still have hope.   I will revert back to One Tree Hill and a question that practically defined a season to help clarify what I think true love really is.  When all your dreams come true, who do you want standing next to you? If you are lucky enough to be able to answer that question, don't forget to tell that person you love them.
"Find a guy who calls you beautiful instead of hot, who calls you back when you hang up on him, who will lie under the stars and listen to your heartbeat, or will stay awake just to watch you sleep...wait for the boy who kisses your forehead, who wants to show you off to the world when you are in sweats, who holds your hand in front of his friends, who thinks you're just as pretty without makeup on.  One who is constantly reminding you of how much he cares and how lucky he is to have you...the one who turns to his friends and says, 'that's her'"- Author Unknown

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