Graduation

Well this week it has been practically impossible to find the time to write not to mention that I was still lacking the inspiration to do so and then Friday, while at my cousin’s graduation, it finally hit me.

 Graduation can mean a lot of different things but ultimately is the ceremony which marks the completion of one phase of our lives and the beginning of whatever it is that comes next.  As I looked around at the hopeful 18 year old kids on what was sure to be one of the biggest days of their lives, I realized how excited they all were and I felt a little twinge of sadness.  I listened to them talk about how boring the speeches were, how they couldn’t wait to leave for senior week, how thank god they would never have to see this teacher or take that class again, and the amazing times they would all have at college next year but I couldn’t help but think that while they were all looking ahead, they were missing the moments right in front of them.   Sure I was happy for them all but in a week, senior week will be nothing more than a handful of good stories to reminisce over and high school will be another chapter of their lives closed so they should enjoy everything as they are living it now. 

One day, hopefully, I will have a family and a job that love.  I will be successful and accomplished and if I’m really lucky, I will be living the life I have always dreamed about but there will be times that I will look back and miss the days of total freedom.  I might miss the ease of living by myself and all the alone time I get to enjoy.  I could miss the simplicity of cooking for one or having no one to answer to but myself.  I very well might even long for the days when I was just figuring out what I wanted to become and how I was going to get there. 

I talk a lot about letting go of expectations and planning but sometimes I forget about that.  Sometimes, without even knowing it, I get wrapped up in worrying about what is coming in the future and what I want so every once in a while, I need a moment to remind me to live for the now and not the maybe someday.

"Nothing is worth more than this day." - Johnann Wolfgang von Goethe